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For My Light that Dimmed in April 1994, I Rise.

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The red crosses mark my 4 angels, now watching over me. The only photo of us all together—my Catholic First Communion.

💜

I Rise.

April—the month my world went silent,
laughter stolen, love torn from my grasp.
The embrace of my parents and two siblings—
now a memory I hold but can never touch.

April 1994 did not just take them;
it tried to take me too—
my voice, my light, my innocence, my will to exist.
Darkness swallowed my paradise,
grief clung like a shadow,
but even then, something within refused to fade.

So I Rise.

Not only on April 7th for my little sister Marie Claudine,
or April 17th for Papa,
or April 24th for Mama and my big brother Jean Félix—
I Rise every day.

I rise for forgiveness—I do it for me.
I rise for love; hatred is too heavy a burden to bear.

I rise for my parents’ three surviving gifts,
my first rays of sunshine, whose existence gave my life meaning.

I rise for the little loves they blossomed, —my precious pearls—
treasures my parents never got to hold, spoil or adore.
I rise for their other halves, who cherish and are deeply cherished.

I rise for the scars I bear— a testament to survival.
I rise for the journey I have walked.
For the life I built far from home,
Rooted in love, standing on solid ground.

I rise for the child I once was—
orphaned, lost, abandoned, poor.
Now, a proof that hope survives.

I rise beyond trauma, beyond nightmares.
My story is no longer just my own.
I rise for the children who walk the road I once did,
for those unseen, unheard, alone.

Rising Above the Storms, a whisper:
“You are not alone, your pain does not define you. You are seen, you are worthy, you too can rise.”

I carry wounds neither time nor any human can heal,
yet still, I rise—undefeated.
When strength fails, faith lifts me.
And one day, beyond sorrow,
I will see and hold them again—forever.

For my light that dimmed in April 1994—
I am Here. I Remember. I Grieve. I Speak. I Forgive. I Hope. I Love.

31 Years.

Still. I Rise.

💜

🕊️💜 In loving memory of my four angels perished during the Genocide against the Tutsi in April 1994. May their memories remain a blessing.❤️ 🕊️

❤️ Impore Rwanda; 26 Years Later, We Still Remember! ❤️

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♥ If tears could build a stairway,
and memories a lane.
I would walk right up to Heaven
and bring you back again ♥ 

A memorial wreath laid on one of the graves at Kigali Genocide Memorial, Gisozi, Rwanda. Feb 2019

This specific Wednesday night, my parents and 4 of my siblings, we all went to bed, completely unsure of what even the next day would look like; you see, earlier that evening around dinner time, we suddenly heard loud explosions nearby, and saw flames in the sky. We then rushed to listen to our home radio receiver only to learn that the plane carrying the president of Rwanda had just been shot down as it landed at Kigali International Airport; the announcement added that the president died, along the president of Burundi and everyone onboard.

That night, all of us kids slept together in the same bedroom with our parents; we were too terrified to sleep anywhere else. 

Reflecting on Memories of my Family and Childhood in what used to be our home. Feb 2019

The next day brought a usual warm and sunny morning, that’d have otherwise been a great opportunity to be outdoors. Unfortunately, nothing could ever have prepared my family for what was about to unfold before our eyes. My little sister Marie Claudine (I had 5 siblings) had been visiting her godmother, Theresa, who lived about 15 minutes away, for Spring/Easter Break. All of the sudden, Theresa, showed up at our house unannounced. She wasn’t alone, but not with my sister either; instead, behind her were men carrying a dead body –my little sister’s, we found out! Theresa informed us that Hutu militiamen attacked her home that very morning, killed her 2 kids and my sister, and looted her house. Theresa had been in hiding at the time of the attack.

With our world crumbling down piece by piece, it was as if a double edged sword has cut deep, deep, through our hearts. Unbeknownst to us then, this very Thursday morning, April 7th, 1994 would mark the beginning of the genocide, the Tutsi ethnic cleansing in Rwanda. Theresa’s kids and my little sister were the first victims in our area. The next 100 days would cost 1 million lives of men, women, children, young, old, strong, beautiful. Their crime? The way they were born, something they did not get an opportunity to bargain with their Creator during their births!

That staggering number would include my parents, and 2 of my siblings, neighbors, classmates, friends, amazing people who had an entire future ahead of them!

Beautiful Kigali, the Capital of Rwanda. Feb 2019

Fast forward to 26 years later, today, our whole planet is reeling under a devastating COVID-19 outbreak, a global pandemic that has brought our normal daily routines to a near standstill, my beautiful home country Rwanda included. Countries imposed lockdowns to stop the imminent spread of the virus. Families are huddled in their homes, some with the possibility of dying of hunger, especially people whose income was based on jobs that cannot be done remotely. The losses of lives are astonishing, and no country is immune to the impact.

Somehow, unfortunately, this danger and fear feels all too familiar to me, although not to the same extent. My eyes have seen things that no young child should ever have to endure. The people of Rwanda have been through so much already, and my heart is heavy for them, especially around this time of the year, during this unprecedented time.

So, will you allow me this opportunity to pour my heart out for my people in the Land of a Thousand Hills? Will you indulge me for a moment, while I weep, grieve, remember, honor, and commemorate innocent lives that we lost, the shameful death our loved ones died in 1994? Spare me a moment of silence, to reflect, to pray, to cherish memories of the people who meant the world to me, whose lives were cut short!

Allow me to ponder on the dates that are forever a reminder of the horror that descended on Rwanda, scars that no lifetime can ever heal: Thursday, April 7th, my little sister Marie Claudine (11) was killed. Sunday, April 17th, my Dad (43) was killed. On Sunday, April 24th, my older brother Jean Felix (15) and my Mom (40) were killed together.

Here is the tribute I wrote for them on the 20th Anniversary of their death: In A Garden of Fame Where Their Treasured Memories Grow Fonder!

The Kigali Genocide Memorial is the final resting place for 250,000+ victims of the Genocide against the Tutsi. Feb 2019

Today Tuesday, April 7th, 2020

  • We remember, commemorate & honor all those Tutsi who died in shame! They didn’t choose to be born the way they were born. May they rest in Eternal Peace with you Jesus, until we will see them again, in a life that knows no sorrow or pain! 
  • God, we pray for Your comfort and love wrapped around every survivor. Please, Lord, give each and every hope, endurance, strength, prosperity, courage, a voice, healing, ability to forgive. You alone can heal the brokenhearted and bind up their wounds.
  • We remember & pray for those left vulnerable—widows, orphans, women who were raped and left with pregnancies and diseases, and those inflicted with physical scars that bring emotional trauma and recurring nightmares.
  • We remember those who were not a target but chose to hide Tutsi, risking their lives. They are the heroes of our survival stories!
  • We pray for the leaders of Rwanda, the president, and everyone around him: for wisdom to lead the country with justice and fairness and continue to move Rwanda forward.
  • We pray for peace over Rwanda; and for genocide perpetrators that themselves will receive forgiveness, come to know the Lord, and repent. We will leave vengeance to God, as it is written that vengeance belongs to Him, and He will repay.
  • We thank you Jesus for the unity, renewal, and healing, progress, prosperity, that has been bestowed upon Rwanda and her people. Amen!

My favorite song, for you Rwanda 🇷🇼: Muririmbire Uwiteka (Sing to the Lord)

“And God will wipe away every tear from their eyes; there shall be no more death, nor sorrow, nor crying. There shall be no more pain, for the former things have passed away.” Revelations 21:4 (NKJV)